My Personal Experience of Jewish Dating

I would like to tell you the story about myself, and how I found God and my true love.

I came from Russia 26 years a go, where God and spiritual connection was suppressed,hardly acknowledged and almost non-acceptable.

Like most of Russian Jews, we came to this country with the dream for a better life and prosperity. To be able to freely express our religion and live within our Jewish traditions.

Immigration to the US was a divine act of God to save us from the chaos that was taking place in Russia, and re-direct our family to a new beginning.

While I was 18 years of age, I’ve spent half of my life in the former USSRe, and half of my life here in US. So, I think I have gotten the best of both worlds; I still have the upbringing and culture from Russia, yet I have already adopted the American way of life.

Being Russian Jewish women really narrows down your choices of men to practically nothing. So, while being single, I have met a lot of local guys within the already established community of Russian Jews in Los Angeles.

While I had made a lot of friends, and dated several young Jewish boys, finding a true love or someone I felt the incredible connection with ,was a dilemma.

Coming from a country where the average age of getting married is 18 years old, I felt a littlepressured to find a husband.

However, after looking around, so to speak, I realize that the majority young Jewish and non Jewish in US, are not so eager to get married at such young age (like yearly twenties). I felt right in place, because I did not feel I was ready to take such big step in my life.

Being that we came from atheistic country, and our religion came down to be pretty reformed, my belief in God was very minimal. So, while getting my college degree, I tried to sort of play God myself by attempting to find a Mr. Right.

And, even though I dated several Jewish guys, I did not really experience a meaning of first love. But one day I met my very first true love.

We have connected in the way I could not explain. The best I could define being in love, is to have flutter feeling in your stomach, dreaming about smiling cupids, and thinking about this person all the time. You get the whole new outlook at life.

We were each others first love; however we both did not really know how to handle this type of serious relationship.

I had an issue of guarding and at the same time expressing my feeling.

Thus, the relationship lasted for several years; we grew apart and went our separate ways. I think this happened because we were growing up, discovering and shaping our characters and personalities. In the process, we lost the very essence why we were together.

The separation is never easy, where you have this emotional burden in your heart, and the pain that you think will never go away. But, as the saying goes, "the time is the best doctor".

So, as the time passed by, I tried to find peace in my soul..And then God came to my rescue…

He sent someone in to my life, a friend who was not even of Jewish faith, but who had guided me to discover him, and inspired me to find eternal peace.

And, by finding God, I was able to receive peace I had never really known or encountered before in my entire life.

While being single again, I preyed to God every day about my life, and about finding a right person for me. I started approaching 27, and again, I felt that itch to get married.

So, under interesting circumstances, I met someone I used to know before, who was a great fiend, and easy to be around. Though, I did not have a physical chemistry with this person, I felt he overcompensated that by his personality. And I though it would be enough to have a meaningful relationship.

So, I went ahead and got married. My communication and relationship with God was fading away, and the only reminder of God I had was the Jewish holidays we celebrated with the family.

However, less then two years later, and no kids, I realized that personality and friendship are not enough of the fuel to run the relationship on. We started having problems, and the relationship came to an end.

And also, some of his family members have truly shown their colors of who they are!

There were lies and speculations on his and their end.

So, I was "happily" ending the relationship and trying to move on with my life.

I was so glad that it was over, because I’ve realized that, I could have spent the best years of my life with someone I do not match and share the same chemistry with.

The divorce is not generally easy transition; however we made the "best" out of it, without any drama or aggravation.

Then, I was single again…I’ve turned to God agan..I’ve asked God, why I went through all of this unnecessary turmoil in my life, why he would let me go through all of this.

And I have unfolded the truth about it all: There are choices in life we make; and those

decisions are not binding toGod’s way or will.. Sometimes we are just taking chances, but that doesn’t mean that God had written that for us in his Book of Life.

Consequently, I took some time off dating and relationship. I felt a little discouraged and pessimistic…I spent sometime by myself, and I believe that being alone can be essential for your emotional recovery, and for your state of mind.

Meantime, I became more devotional and spiritual, and more close to God.

I have gained more inner peace, then I could ever imagine. Reading the bible and preying became a substantial part of my everyday life.

At some point later, I felt there was the time to start dating..

The blind dates, that were set up by some friends and family were not successful.

There was also a limited array of single Russian Jewish men, who were available.

A lot of single jewish men in their early thirties were already married or involved with someone.

Or you just simply know too many people, who you grew up with, and they are not dating material.

Going to popular places for russian jewish singles, like restaurants and clubs, gotten old and had become a very insufficient place to meet someone.

I’ve continuously preyed and asked God for a miracle…

And short time after, I discovered internet dating…

Internet dating for singles just barely became popular back then, so I was not so anxious to sign up on one of those online dating services.

Some single Jewish men and women would be very pessimistic about it; or feel that turning to online dating is a total desperation!

But I kept going, something inside me pushed me to follow ahead..

I wanted to look for acquaintance and naturalness in these types of dating services.

The first step, I signed up with Online Jewish Dating Service to minimize the effort of finding just Jewish single men. I was excited and nervous at the same time.

I loved the fact that these services are available for exclusively Jewish singles.
It was like a relief to know that so many quality professionals, who are single, in your age bracket, and residing in Los Angeles. The whole online dating experience was pretty safe and discrete.

You would get the e-mails from the online dating service, notifying you that you have someone interested in you. And, you do not have to respond if you do not see any type of attraction or would be connection. Now the variety people was just endless, and you can narrow down a single person to the zip code.. The searching criteria allowed you to find someone with similar believes and personality traits.

So, I trusted that God had guided me to the Jewish Online Dating to find my Mr. Right.

Sure enough, I met my prince right a way. That was about four years a go.

He happened to be exactly what I asked and preyed to God for! Tall, dark and handsome.

A fantastic and caring person; we fell in love with immediately.

I felt as though God had sanctified our love and relationship!

When we met for the first time, we both new right a way that this was meant to be, and that we are soul mates. We felt that our previous relationships were just a stepping stones to get to each other. It’s been a long journey for both of us, but we made it here..

He is an amazing person, who’s had it hard by the way, but who can appreciate a relationship, and is not afraid to show his feelings. Since then, we’ve got married, and have a three year old daughter.. We give each other the things we need, and we support each other unconditionally. I know now more then ever, that he is the one for me!

We keep our relationship fun, and always inspire each other’s creativity and imagination.

This union would never happen, if it was not for the God’s divine power and intervention.And the internet, Jewish online dating service, he used as a tool to bring us together.

Even though, we lived in the same city, chances are we would never meet.

God finds the ways for you to meet the person who will make your world go round!

I have never stopped believing and preying to God ever since…

Not a day goes by, that I thank him for everything that I have today..

No matter what life throws my way. I put my trust, my worries in him, and he never lets me down.

Some days are good and some days are better, but when I look at my daughter’s eyes, nothing in the world matters! When she reaches out to me, and tells me that she loves me,

I feel like it’s a pinnacle point of my life.

In conclusion, I hope for all Jewish singles that are searching for their love and destiny;

Keep your faith and believe in supernatural power; do not stop waiting for your miracle!

Tanya W.